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Anger Management and Control Therapy

Those who seek therapy to learn how to control their anger have usually struggled with anger for a long time. They come for help because they do not like how anger is affecting themselves and their loved ones.

Anger is a complex emotion that often covers overwhelming pain. Many people who experience chronic anger have been repeatedly exposed to anger as children. As adults, they feel isolated and dissatisfied in their relationships. Their intimate partners are distanced from them because of the anger.

When clients come for therapy, they learn right away that they are not bad people because they have trouble staying calm. Rather, they discover that they are simply people in pain and, that when the pain hits, it feels overwhelming and tough to contain. Clients learn how to notice and accept their angry feelings without needing to explode. They next learn to identify their personal "triggers", the thoughts and feelings that habitually result in an angry outburst. They are then taught specific, effective coping strategies for dealing with the "triggers". In short, clients learn how to manage stress and painful feelings and to solve the problems that fuel the anger.

It takes commitment and lots of practice to change old habits, sometimes a few months. However, the work is well worth the effort. Clients report significant changes in their lives. They feel much better about themselves. As well, they and their intimate partners report far less conflict and much more emotional closeness in their relationship.

Much of the information in this article is adapted from:
The Anger Control Workbook, by Matthew McKay & Peter Rogers
published by New Harbinger Publications, Inc., 2002

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